It has recently come to my attention that I would really like to talk about a few things some fellow classmates have blogged about: the subject of women and their place in society/the attitudes women have because of society. Obviously they haven't titled their blog posts like that, but that is, in essence, what they have blogged about by focusing in on (sorry guys, I have to point these out) the "security" of wearing makeup, and the "security" of having a man (boyfriend/husband/whatever).
By now I'm pretty sure that the majority of my Writing Power class thinks I am some crazy liberal lesbian who has no problem living out of dumpsters and is patiently awaiting the destruction of corporate America. Even though there isn't a problem with being ANY of those things, before I move on I'd like to say that no, I am not a crazy liberal, a lesbian, nor do I currently hate the state of the world enough to want the destruction of one of it's main pillars. I just really, REALLY believe there is more to life than just going through the motions.
The post in A Girls 12 Best Friends I have pointed out really struck a nerve with me. She clearly brings up a massive issue with society today, and goddamn, I am going to address it, and then beat it with a stick until it's writhing on the floor. She says in her first sentence that, "I think I would rather commit suicide than leave my house without first applying the daily dose of makeup". Wow. There are two interesting things here: that she relates leaving the house without makeup to killing oneself (social suicide maybe?), and she uses the word "dose" when she refers to makeup, like the makeup is some kind of cure for something. There is obviously a problem with the Western world and the mental health of it's women, and things like makeup only add to the problem. Why is it that so many women feel that they are not good enough to walk out into the world without plastering their faces with chemicals and pigments? Yeah, I could totally blame this entire problem on corporate America and the makeup companies, but now that I think about it more, that is really just a scapegoat. Having something/someone else to blame is only making you comfortable with being the victim, and that is what the author of the post is saying: "I am okay with being a victim because it was high school/the pretty girls that made me so insecure." Yeah, maybe those things helped make you feel the way you do, but after a while it falls into your lap and you can decide to take control of the situation, it's just that you chose not to. In this situation, taking the easy way out is to obsessively apply the makeup and rather die without it. In this situation, taking the easy way out is to blame a faceless "them" for your problems. In this situation, taking the easy way out is remaining the victim when you can do so much better.
I'm not really sure I can go as in-depth with the second blog because I am having kind of a hard time understanding it thoroughly, but the same issues pop up: victimization and insecurity. Why is is that "every girl" HAS to have a man to feel protected? I, for one, know that I do not need a man (or another person regardless of gender) to feel protected because I know I can protect myself. She says, "someone who can defend her at any cost is something that only a guy can offer". Excuse my language, but that is bullshit. That is the exact same attitude that has no problem with being the victim because "oh goodness, but the men are supposed to protect me from all the bad things!" It enrages me that women don't take the time to educate and empower themselves against the things that turn us into victims, including their own minds. Learn how to protect yourself. Learn what makes you feel good about yourself. Learn what you can do to stop hating yourself. Learn to stop being a victim to the things that suck you in without you realizing it. The only one that cares about you and can protect you is yourself. No one else is going to be stuck with you for the rest of forever.
There are so many other things I want to say, but I don't think I can without making it seem like I'm vomiting words all over blogspot. Now I'm going to toss this into the court of my Writing Power classmates, and anyone else who stumbles upon this and has an opinion.
Don't punk out on this, guys; I really want to know what you think about this entire situation.
**Amanda & Katie, I have nothing against you guys. I really just had to get this off my chest. High-five for making thought-provoking blog posts without even realizing it!
6 comments:
OMG! I LOVE YOU! Your post says everthing that I am thinking when I read other posts or even look at current media. They say repression and segregation is dead in today's day in age but if you read between the lines, segregation is alive and well!!! Women, since their existence with Eve in the Garden, have been stereotyped and criticized for their sex. Today people say that such things do not exist anymore and we live in a country where everyone, no matter what gender, is equal. HELL NO!!!!!!!! Stereotypes rule the world of womanhood. What is an even bigger kick in the ass is that women are the ones who place those staereotypes on themselves most often (example, the ideas you mentioned in your post). I for one, and I'm sure you have to, have governed my life in a way that breaks and contests all woman-associated stereotypes. It is my mission in life to not surrender to any stereotypes associated with women. All I have to say is POWER TO THE WOMEN WHO CAN EMPOWER THEMSELVES AND BE POWERFUL WOMEN!!!!!!!!! (end of rant)
Wow Ashley...this was an excellent post. Even though I might come across to you as an insecure, I totally agree with what you said, and how we really need to stop blaming others for our actions and our insecurities. While I would agree that girls need to stop relying on others to be happy, such as makeup/guys, I do think that the media has put an unattainable standard of beauty in front of girls, which might partly explain the higher rates of suicide, depression, eating disorders, and other issues affecting women. I think the key point that you were saying is that we as women need to realize that the standards set for us are unattainable. We need to be at peace with that, and strive to be the best we can be, in our own circumstances.
The more we rely on guys attention, through relationships and makeup, the more others are going to see us as needy and victims of insecurity.
AH! This was such a great post. I'm pretty sure that it will bring up some interesting discussion to say the least. I'm glad you posted this though, because it definitely is a good reminder to me, because as you know, I can be rather insecure and neurotic. :-) I'm really going to try to be more confident with myself.
Ashley,
I believe you missed the point of this entire project. From what I thought, it was supposed to be a fun project to end the semester in En320. The point of my blog is to point out the things MOST girls have in their everyday life. I understood your comment about my analogy and if you took the time to look you would see i changed that part of my post because i understood how it could be offensive and i didnt want to hurt your feelings. Apparently you do not have the same type of respect considering i find your post completely rude and a big misinterpretation on your part. I think your entitled to your opinion on todays society, however when you specifically point out my blog (and katies for that matter) you open up a new can of worms. i feel completely disrespected that you would call me out like this and once you did that you turned this project from a fun way to get things off our mind to a psychological evaluation of your class mates. EVERYONE has insecurities, and i believe you even told me about one of your own. And i don not think you would appreciate me writing and entire post on your specific insecurity that i will not name because I HAVE AN OUNCE OF RESPECT left for you.
**good job on writing a very though provoking blog though!
Amanda-
First, thank you for taking the time to respond.
Second, I think the point of this "assignment" was to blog, which is what we all are doing. You have a different vision of what blogging is opposed to my vision of it, and we are both going through with it. You did not have to edit and censor your post because you thought I found something "offensive" about it.
I clearly said at the end of my post that I have nothing against you for believing in what you believe, and if you are entitled to believe in the things you hold close to you, then I have the right to do the same. It is unfortunate, however, that you feel disrespected.
If you really would take pleasure in blogging about my eating disorder, please, feel free to do so. I am not ashamed of it, and I am also not sorry for my blog post. I am free to say what I feel (and what is bothering me), and so are you. Do not, however, hold it over my head and try to patronize me with it =)
what I was saying Ashley, is you crossed the line (my line at least), and many other people agree.
Then let those other people step forward and tell me so instead of speaking through you. If my "line-crossing" elicits a reaction, then that's great.
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